


12 Days of Sides-mas

by MagpieMorality



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: 1950s AU, ADHD!Remus, Allusions to child abandonment/abuse/neglect, Alternate Universe - 1950s, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Victorian, Curses, Editor!Logan, F/F, F/M, Farmhands/Ranchers, Fem!Logan, Fem!Patton - Freeform, Fem!Roman, Gen, Genderbend, Highschool AU, Hispanic!Roman, Holiday Writing Challenge, I mean in the way Odette and the swans are shapeshifters in SL, If you read it that way, Implied Nudity, Kid!Patton, Kid!Roman, LAMP first christmas in canon, M/M, Mishandled learning difficulties, Multi, Other, Past Tense, Plumber!Patton, Plumber!Roman, Polyamory, Present Tense, Prince!Roman, Professor!Logan, Shapeshifters - Freeform, Swan Lake - Freeform, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, Thief!Virgil, Unsympathetic Deceit Sanders, Vaugely historical that is, Vomiting, YouTuber!Remus, YouTuber!Roman, ace!Deceit, eboy!Virgil, fem!Virgil, kid!Deceit, kid!Logan, kid!Remus, poly romantic LAMP, proposal, punk!deceit, swan lake AU, very vague
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:55:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 12,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21837850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagpieMorality/pseuds/MagpieMorality
Summary: Writing challenge for the days running up to Christmas, to write a small piece themed on the 12 days of Christmas song every day.Mix of AUs, characters, relationships and settings, tags updated as we go along!
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil/Creativity | Roman/Logic | Logan/Morality | Patton, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Other possible readings of the 12th chapter, the last two are possible readings of the 12th chapter
Comments: 48
Kudos: 130





	1. A Partridge in a Pear Tree

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Logan and Patton, human kids AU

“No _you’re_ supposed to wear the funny hat this time! It’s not _fair_ \- I _had_ my turn! I want the normal one back again!”

A stomping of a small foot accompanied the frustrated shout, the lethal combination finished off with the firm crossing of arms. Logan was not playing around. He’d worn the silly hat _all day yesterday_ while they were bundled up warm to play outside, and the flapping decorative wings either side of his face had been nothing short of utterly infuriating as they’d tried to play chase, the beak bouncing in his eyes when he’d attempted to dodge; losing him the game and a not insignificant amount of pride...

“But it’s too big for me!” Patton squeaked back indignantly from just outside the door where he’d already snuck out with the regular hat on. Logan eyed it jealously. It was a nice dark blue with a single white stripe and there was nothing dangling off it _anywhere_. It was perfect. 

Not like the monstrosity on his head!

“It’s too big for me too!” Logan stomped his foot again, but Patton was immune to the power of foot stomping and didn’t even flinch. “C’mon Pat, _please_? Pretty please? You can have all of my-” he gulped, preparing to make the ultimate sacrificial deal; “ _all of my blueberry Crofters I have left for breakfast this week_!” Logan got it out in a rush before he could reconsider the terrible price he was offering to pay.

Patton’s mouth dropped open with a gasp and he stepped back into the house in his shock and awe, eyes wide. “You- you would give up your _Crofters_?! Logan that’s your super duper ooper favourite _ever_!” Logan nodded miserably, arms still folded tightly over his chest. 

“I don’t want to wear the hat,” he mumbled. 

Patton caught him in a gentle hug, pulling the blue hat off and settling it carefully over Logan’s hair, mindful not to dislodge his glasses. “There, and you don’t even have to give me your jelly, Logan. But... maybe I can still share some with you anyway?” He made quick work of pulling the offensive item onto his own head, settling the wings flat on the sides of his face. “And besides, it’s probably better for me to have this anyway! It’s a _pat_ -ridge hat, right?” 

“It’s a _partridge_ ,” Logan enunciated carefully and not super confidently, before breaking into a small smile and letting his arms drop. “But I like pat-ridge better.” And the hat did suit Patton pretty well, his curls peeking out from under the soft brown material and the beak bumping his button nose gently as he moved to grin back. 

“Well then; race you to the treehouse!” 

They hared off without further ado, climbing the ladder onto the platform that passed for a treehouse in the garden, built as it was in the boughs of a sturdy old pear tree, asleep for the winter. 

(Logan even let Patton tell his pun about being the _pat-ridge in the pear treehouse_ five whole times without failing to snort at it, as a gesture of goodwill. It was Christmas, after all.)


	2. Two Turtle Doves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman & Remus (& Logan), YouTubers AU

The camera light blinked red, the room still and quiet. For a moment nothing happened, and then Roman exploded into action. 

"What is up everybody?!" He shouted, jumping forwards only to be blocked off by Remus ducking under his arm to take centre stage. 

"What's up my non-gender-specific dudes?!" Roman pushed against his twin until they were shoulder to shoulder in shot, Remus compromising by throwing his arm around Roman's neck and ruffling his hair. 

"Today we're- quit that, dude! Today we're performing a short song in honour of Christmas, which is _right_ around the corner! We read all your amazing submissions-"

"And some not so amazing, honestly-" 

"Re! They were _all_ great, thank you so much to everyone who came up with some lines or entire songs, and for those of you who wrote _and_ recorded something we've got a little something in the works for later on in the holidays, okay? So what we di-" Roman let out a shriek as Remus attempted to pants him, dropping down onto the floor so only the top of his head was visible as he fixed the situation. 

  
Remus smugly took over. "We came up- well _I_ came up with a great idea-" Their editor and general technical dogsbody Logan rolled his eyes from the corner where he was manning the sound equipment, making a mental note to overlay that particular claim with some text clarifying that it was, in fact, _Patton's_ idea... "to make a Frankenstein song with as many of the ideas you all had that made sense together! So we hacked and chopped and sutured this monster together, and now-"

"And now we're going to cut to the performance. Please enjoy this festive frankenstein bop; Two Turtle Doves." They held position for a moment before Logan gave them a thumbs up and moved to switch the camera off. Remus dived on his brother with a whoop, and they fell to the ground in a tangle of chaos. 

Logan just rolled his eyes and started to set up for their performance recording. His work as Creativitwins most important member was never over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AU notes: 
> 
> Roman and Remus are twins who run a youtube channel together where they post a lot of singing and prank videos. Logan is their editor and techie; Patton is their artist in residence slash roommate and Virgil and his roommate D are both huge fans.


	3. Three French Hens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DR LAMP, 1950s farm AU

_November 14th, 1953._

A cold wind blew threw the pastures and rolling hills, whipping up dust and chilling the bones of the men who worked out on the land. It heralded the first of the winter snowstorms, and without a word the workers glanced at each other and knew- it would be a tough winter this year.

They worked tirelessly to finish their work before haring off on horseback to bring in the cattle and hope that none would be lost. Because they would all suffer, if that happened. All but a pair- a mother and her nearly grown calf- were quickly rounded up, but one of the men refused to return and cut his losses like the rest.

The wind was higher than ever and Virgil kicked his horse up to Patton's side to insist he return with them all. "You can't stay out here!" He yelled over the howling gale. "You'll freeze to death 'fore you find a damn thing!"

Patton shook his head, cheeks red and teeth visibly chattering. "No I've got to try, dammit! They could be close by!"

"Patton don't be foolish," called Logan, having made his way over to join them. The twins and the man that went only by Smith were already halfway down the valley towards the farm, but had paused to see what was happening, merely specks in the distance corralling the herd. "That's a death sentence. I won't hear of it."

"Mr Logan _please_ -"

"No! Get your ass down this hill and inside. _Now_!"

Patton seemed to teeter on the edge of indecision for a moment, and Virgil steeled himself to bolt after his friend if necessary, hands tight and white-knuckled on the reins. He still had his lasso on him- he'd be damned if they lost the farmhand to this cursed weather. Patton was worth more than a few sides of beef and some pails of milk, a damn sight more if you asked Virgil.

But in the end it wasn't necessary, _thank_ _God_. Patton turned back to stare down Logan who returned the eye contact without flinching, his own gaze hard and immovable. And Patton caved, slumping miserably in his saddle with a visible but inaudible sigh.

The wind picked up again and Virgil had to clamp a hand down on his hat to stop it blowing away, but he waited- as did Logan- until Patton nudged his horse back into motion down towards home. They followed with a shared glance, hurrying down the hillside to help out. 

Every last man silently agreed not to mention Patton's sniffles that night over dinner as he barely touched his soup. In a kinder world, or a softer season, they would have maybe sympathised and joined him in his grief, but here and now there was no time for sentimentality. There was still work to do. 

_December 9th, 1953._

The wind did indeed bring the snow, and it was only by sheer luck that they had enough food stored to keep six grown men fed. Heating was barely an issue for the same reason; the farmhouse was well-built and apart from Logan who had the master bedroom they all shared rooms. With the fire well stoked and the animals right next door in the barn as a convenient windshield the inhabitants managed to remains generally comfortable for most of the day. When the temperature dropped again, however, the mutual agreement was made to pull all the blankets and mattresses down to the floor by the fireplace to preserve energy. 

"What do you think the stars think of us?" Remus' voice was soft in the dim glow of the burning wood. His brother Roman shrugged from next to him, stretching an arm up to hook behind his head, eyes closed. "You think they think we're just dumb animals, like our cattle?" 

"Maybe they think we're so small we're not even interesting at all," Patton suggested from Roman's other side, propping up on his forearms to peer over at Remus. "Maybe they look the other way instead."

Virgil shifted but didn't join in, making eye contact with Smith, who was tucked up in the great armchair, eyes open just a crack and glinting every now and then as the flames moved. They shared a tiny smile before Virgil closed his eyes again and Smith went back to staring into the fire. 

"I think they must be fascinated. All these amazing things we do, in such a short time?" Roman offered quietly. They all fell silent when Logan shifted on the couch with a mumble, before settling back into his usual deep sleep. "I mean, they're just up there all the time, doing nothing, going nowhere... I'd be impressed by us if I were them." 

"You're easily impressed," Remus teased, hissing when Roman pinched him.

"Look, the stars probably don't think at all. Can we all agree on that and get some sleep?" Virgil asked, refusing to open his eyes again but unable to drift off. "Ro, you got one of your lullabies instead?" 

Roman hummed thoughtfully, and they fell asleep to the soft sound of his singing, sweet melody and indistinct words lulling them down to dream. 

_December 25th, 1953_

"Patton! Wake up!" Patton was jolted awake by the rare sound of Smith calling his name. Well, loudly whispering. He stirred with a groan, squinting one eye open. Smith was knelt by his head, wiping the ash from his hands, clearly having finished stoking up the morning's fire. "Merry Christmas," Smith grinned, and Patton's eyes widened when he realised. 

What followed was chaos; utter, joyous chaos. Remus woke up and promptly jumped on Roman in some old brotherly tradition they had, and as they roughhoused Virgil was nearly flattened and took only a moment to enthusiastically join in on the playfighting. Logan was already up and brought them coffee with peppermint and chocolate, allowing them all a few minutes of peace before they were immediately roped into his well-planned schedule. 

Patton and Virgil were on vegetables, Roman was handling the meat and Remus and Smith were sent out to add the finishing touches to the house. They brought back holly and ivy and a stout tree, graciously accepting the exuberant help of their colleagues in decorating the branches with whatever they could find. A ribbon; a paper snowflake; an old bauble from the year before. It was messy and haphazard and _theirs_.

They'd finished their dinner at long last when Smith went up to his room to fetch his harmonica, letting out a shout of surprise that summoned the rest of the men in a hurry. 

He was sitting on the ground laughing when they got upstairs, to their surprise, because huddled in his bed, looking for all the world like there was a body underneath, were three grumpy hens sitting on a small pile of eggs. 

Patton declared it a Christmas gift and they turned the eggs into eggnog when the hens were turfed back out into the barn. 

And the antics of six fully grown men drunk off their backsides on eggnog and Christmas cheer? Were wild indeed...

_February 2nd, 1954_

When the weather broke it was as though the entire hillside had breathed a sigh of relief. The land was no longer corseted in a tight binding of snow, and the animals went almost as mad as the men. Though they may have enjoyed the snowball fights, and the holiday, and they cosy living arrangements; they were all at their happiest when they were working hard and working together. 

Patton's hope that they'd find the cow and her calf was quickly dashed when he spotted a coyote in the area, one morning while out with the cattle they did have. He gave the hillside one last sweep with grief in his heart before letting it fade into peace, pushing his shoulders back. There would be more to come for them to tend and care for over the year ahead, there was no time to drag his heels. 

And there was work to do. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had great fun with this one, just a bit of a different style to usual and experimenting with the date snapshot format! 
> 
> Logan owns the farm, but only technically because it belonged to a cousin who inherited and didn't want to take care of it themselves. Patton grew up on the farm with the animals, Roman and Remus, Virgil, and Smith all showed up independently looking for work and never left.


	4. Four Collie Birds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil, Logan, Roman & Patton, The First Christmas

An- _Virgil_ was sat in his room on the floor, scrolling through his tumblr. The door was open, and through it he could hear the sounds of voices in the distant living room, and smell all sorts of delicious things baking. 

The voices were Logan and Roman, currently arguing over who was right about the lyrics of a particular Christmas song. They'd been going round and round for a good twenty minutes already, and Virgil was surprised that Patton hadn't beaten them both around the head with a wooden spoon, honestly. There were only so many times you could hear the exact same argument made, only getting progressively louder, before it drove you to violence. Probably. Virgil didn't really know? He'd never been in a living situation where you had friendly housemates that held arguments with each other that didn't swiftly devolve into battles to the death; genuinely cruel and personal snipes; or one or more people involved leaving and refusing to talk to the other again. 

It was a novel experience, hence the open door. 

Patton's perky voice interjected briefly, and Virgil's ears pricked up curiously, but there was just a moment's silence from the other two and then they were protesting whatever he said, and returning to their disagreement. Patton must have decided he'd contributed plenty and returned to baking, but if the sudden loud clanging of utensils and subsequent turning on of the electric mixer was any indication; he was finally getting a little tired of the situation. 

Virgil looked down at his phone, and glanced away when he realised he hadn't even been taking in anything he'd scrolled through while he'd been eavesdropping. Too busy being a nosy parker. What would they think if they knew? He was on shaky ground as it was, but if any of the other three came by- not that they would honestly Virgil why would you even think that it's ridiculous- but if they _did_ then they'd probably yell at him for listening in! Or even just for not participating! Patton took social time very seriously, maybe he would think- maybe he _already_ thought Virgil was being rude by staying in his room while they were all downstairs and on _Christmas Eve_ no less- 

Fourseveneight. Four, seven, eight. Four. Seven. Eight. Four. Seven. Eight. There we go. 

He sat up and back against his bed frame. It must be nice to be so sure of the world and your place in it that thoughts like that didn't come buzzing in any time they pleased. It must be nice being confident in your role and relationships and not questioning everything to the point of physically being affected on a regular basis. He wanted that, for Thomas and for himself, and yet in moments like these- despite all the progress they'd just made when they came to retrieve him from his self-imposed exile- Virgil secretly wondered if it was ever on the cards. Sure that was the _point_ , right? In accepting anxiety? Accepting him as part of Thomas? But accepting didn't mean giving in to, and Virgil knew the others had to wonder at what stage acceptance would turn into action and working on steadily removing him bit by bit. 

Strangely, the thought didn't even make him anxious in itself. It was oddly soothing, because it was the worst case scenario, so it was literally what his brain wanted him to think about at all times. And there was a security in 'knowing' what would happen. It was just a shame. 

Because he was kind of enjoying the voices and the smells and the smiles and the friendship and Thomas greeting him instead of recoiling from him. And it was Christmas, so for once Virgil allowed himself a moment to imagine a scenario where he never quite got better, but that was _okay_. It looked a little something like; Patton, smiling and giving him a squeeze of the hand as he walked by to the kitchen to make four mugs of coffee instead of three. Logan, sitting and rambling through various details about space and the stars when Virgil went to him voluntarily during a more panicked moment. Roman, dragging him along and not taking no for an answer onto an adventure in the imagination, where they were both heroes, saving innocents from harm in their own ways...

From his spot on the floor Virgil smiled at the thought, blinking back to reality when he realised the noise had stopped. 

He looked up just as Logan knocked on the already open door, and they stared at each other for a moment before Logan cleared his throat. "Patton is nearly ready to take the gingerbread out, and we can start decorating. Are you- I mean we never really invited you, I apologise for that, but are you coming to join us?" 

"Um," ohgodohgodwhatshouldhesay. "I-"

"If you'd prefer not to, that is also acceptable. Patton would understand, we all would." 

Normally Virgil would have taken that badly. It was easy to misinterpret as Logan offering him an out and secretly hoping he'd take it, because they didn't really want him there... but after his nice daydream and seeing the genuine warmth on Logan's face, Virgil cut himself some slack and shook his head. "Actually I'd, I'd really like that." 

"Oh good!" Logan perked up, and Virgil's little emo heart ached a little to see the reaction. "Patton will be delighted. And Roman is in a bit of a- well he's a Christmas fan, I'm sure you're aware, so he's a bit exuberant, you have been warned." 

It made Virgil stifle a soft chuckle, and he stood up to join the other side. "Yeah I kinda heard. He's really stubborn about this, huh," he snorted. Logan wrinkled his nose. 

  
"I wish he'd just see sense! It is quite well documented that the original line is-"

"Four collie birds, after blackbirds, yeah," Virgil interrupted, enjoying Logan's pleased surprise. "But I mean, I guess the whole point of songs like that is that they evolve. Like society, and the people singing. So maybe the more interesting fact about it isn't knowing the original line, but knowing-"

"Knowing the lines changed at all!" Logan finished along with him, shooting him a thoughtful look. "You know, Virgil, you're very insightful. I have several other linguistic factoids I would love to discuss if you wish? We can go through them while we decorate the cookies. Oh, and once Roman has been informed of your game-changing perspective, of course." 

Virgil smiled shyly at him, and Logan smiled back. "Sounds good to me."

The door to his room stayed open all night, and he didn't return to it until late, when Patton ushered them all to bed so that Santa could visit. 

The next day he was up before breakfast when Roman dragged him out because "it's _CHRISTMAS_!" And he couldn't have been happier to find himself on the couch for most of the day, smelling the cooking and hearing the voices from up close, but this time able to join in and enjoy every little extra thing about being around the other three that just wasn't the same from in his room. 

It was the best Christmas ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A wee bit late, but once I started this it just flowed. I love Virgil with all my heart, and seeing him become a part of things and letting himself be a part of things, more importantly, was so wholesome. So a bit of a throwback to his first Christmas! (don't think about the timelines too much either, I binged the series so I have no reference for when AA came out in the year!!)


	5. FIVE GOLD RINGS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan, Virgil, Patton & Roman, Human!Poly!AU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 5+1 of Professor Logan trying to propose to his boyfriends and being mostly unsuccessful! And technically there are only 4 rings, but we won't worry about that...

5\. 

Logan's first attempt at proposing to his boyfriends was planned months in advance. He had never really been the one to instigate any part of their relationship, and he wanted this situation to be different. He planned and plotted and planned some more until he had a rock-solid idea that couldn't possibly be faulted; they would go to Disneyworld in December and after the fireworks show in the privacy of their hotel he would propose. He had the rings ready to go, sized perfectly, and the other three were crazy excited for their vacation- what could go wrong? 

Well- he thought to himself as he sat drenched in the courtyard with a foil blanket and the staff buzzed around frantically- apparently a lot of things could. Including, but not limited to; Patton getting food poisoning and having to head home early, Roman locking himself in the bathroom and setting Virgil off in a panic attack, the room above theirs flooding through the ceiling, Patton being forced to vomit into a bin and nearly making Logan throw up from the smell, and the fire alarm going off shortly afterwards. 

Somehow, after the whole debacle was sorted and they were collapsing gratefully into their new room to get some well-deserved sleep, it didn't quite seem like the right moment to go ahead with the proposal, and Logan tabled the idea for a better time. 

4\. 

Logan's second attempt was even more thoroughly planned. He'd rented out a boat for Patton's birthday and double and _triple_ checked that the caterer was top notch and the plumbing was all up to snuff (the boat company had been a bit surprised by that query but they'd provided the MOT happily enough). 

They piled on with their cases, oohing and aahing and complimenting his choice. Logan smiled to himself, already pleased but imagining the reaction to the lavish dinner and proposal to follow that evening. It was bound to be even better than his previous idea could have been- it was far more private on the boat and the stars were out in full force. No one to bother and no one to be bothered by. What could go wrong? 

He was going to stop asking himself that question, he decided, shortly after Roman had been retrieved from the water after he'd tripped on a rope and toppled in, perhaps one glass of champagne too far in. Patton was still calming down and Virgil had taken up residence by Roman, towelling him dry and warm and glaring at anyone who tried to come and take over the job from him. Logan ended up having to do far too much paperwork over the next week to waiver any legal repercussions, because Roman hadn't even been wearing a life vest and had knowingly gone over his limit (even if he was grumbling about the lack of good lighting to anyone who would ask). 

Logan just about resisted the urge to swear, and the rings went back into hiding. 

3\. 

Logan's _third_ plan was simple. He just could not find it in himself to put all that effort into an elaborate plan again when the previous two had gone so badly. And he refused to tempt fate by believing what he'd come up with was foolproof. They had a date night to see Roman in a show that provided the right atmosphere, and on the way back Logan was confident (cautiously) that when they got in it would finally be time to see the looks on their faces when he pulled the rings out. He hadn't even dared hope nothing would go wrong, but the mugger still showed up out of nowhere to grab Patton's bag and end up being chased by Roman and then the police were called and Virgil had to be taken home to calm down about the whole thing by Patton who _also_ had to calm down but mostly because he was going red in the face as he puffed up and ranted threats at the poor arrested mugger, swinging his newly retrieved bag wildly. 

So, that was a bust.

2\. 

Did the fourth time even count as a plan? He wasn't sure. A few weeks later, he was in the living room with Virgil cradled in his lap, Roman by their tangled feet singing along to Moana, Patton humming from the kitchen. When they were called in to eat he decided on a whim that now was the right moment, and headed upstairs to grab the rings. 

That was when the smoke alarm went off. 

Logan just sighed and put the rings back before hurrying downstairs to help. 

1\. 

It was his last attempt before he just sent them a text in the group chat or something. Their anniversary apparently merited a small party with some of their closest friends, and Patton had laid out a magnificent dinner spread for them all. The night was civilised- not too much alcohol; no falling over or muggers or disasters of any kind. Logan was actually a little suspicious, because hey- he had reason to be okay? 

They toasted their relationship and Logan slipped away to get the rings at last as Patton and Virgil swayed together to some soft music in the living room, noses rubbing together fondly. He watched with a soft smile as he walked up the stairs, catching Roman's eye and blinding grin on the other side of the room and- 

-Well he couldn't _exactly_ blame _Roman_ for him missing his footing and tumbling heavily down the stairs now, could he, but a small part of him _really_ wanted to, if only to avoid the many embarrassing jokes that followed ("can't believe you actually fell for us, Specs!"). 

And when he was told he had to take the next few days off work to let the tiny (really, it was barely more than a sprain) fracture in his ankle heal up, he had plenty of time to consider that maybe the universe was sending him some kind of sign, and that it was time to give up and wait for someone else to inevitably pop the question first. 

+1. 

Almost six months after his first proposal attempt the previous Christmas, Logan was coming home late from work. It was nearly the end of term and his lectures were both ramping up and also winding down, students trying to cram as much in before they had to start studying for their finals and him trying to keep up and help them actually take it all in. It was exhausting and all he wanted was to sit down on the couch and have a good cuddle with his boyfriends. 

When he got home, however, the house was uncharacteristically dark. There was a light on in the kitchen and a note on the table that directed him to the back garden, that he followed after a moment of trying to figure out what the hell was going on. 

When Logan stepped outside it was simultaneously a dream and a nightmare. Because the whole garden was decked out like a fairytale; lights everywhere and his three gorgeous boyfriends dressed up and waiting for him with matching smiles. And his heart sank because he knew what this was, and like he'd predicted- _someone else had got there first_. 

Patton's smile faltered first and he glanced at the other two hesitantly. "Um, Logan? Are you okay?" Logan shook himself and forced himself to relax, pasting on a smile. "Honey, before you say anything, just let us explain, okay?" 

"We had a talk, Lo, and we realised that there was a bit of a pattern, and um," 

"And I found the hidden boxes!" Patton interrupted Roman, bouncing on his feet. "So we figured you were trying to-"

"To ask us the big question and we couldn't figure out why it was taking you so _long_ but then-" 

"But then," Virgil took over from Roman, quelling him with a look. "We realised you kept organising these beautiful moments that kept going wrong. And we figured out pretty quick that you might be a bit... frustrated with that." He stepped forwards to take Logan's hands, guiding him out into the garden proper. "So we thought, why not help you out? We're a team, after all, right?" 

Logan was stunned, and still slightly confused, but he softened at Virgil's hopeful expression and nodded for them to continue. Patton moved closer, hugging his arm and resting his cheek on Logan's shoulder with a happy hum. "So we thought we'd organise this one for you, sugar pie, and here we are!" 

Roman held out a handful of familiar black boxes, clearing his throat until Virgil and Patton moved back to their places spread out in front of Logan. He took the rings with shaking fingers, clearing his throat, turning first to Roman and sinking down to one knee. 

And suddenly it was real. Everyone's breath caught and Logan deftly opened the right box, holding the shining band up proudly. He would never quite be able to remember what he'd come up with on the spot, but Roman's radiant smile and barely restrained 'yes' would be forever seared into his memory, along with the kiss he'd received after he'd slid the ring onto his first fiance. 

When he turned to Virgil and took a knee again he heard sniffles coming from- honestly probably all of them. Virgil barely let him get a word out before interrupting with a soft, trembling ' _yes_ ' and pulling Logan up to rest their foreheads together as they other man slipped his ring on. He stepped back into Roman's arms as they watched the final perfect proposal. 

Patton was beautiful in the twinkling lights. It was hardly fair, because Logan didn't have much air to begin with, but now he was dry-mouthed and gasping. They'd been together first out of all them and their history was perfect and complicated and stretched back too many years to count now. When he looked at Patton he didn't know how he could fit that into words. Patton looked back as if he understood completely, and he probably did. 

"Patton, I love you. Will you marry me?" It was as good as he could manage, soft and slightly choked, and Patton just smiled before holding his finger out and promptly bursting into tears when the ring was settled into place. 

It was perfect. They were perfect. And Logan was left wondering why he'd thought he could ever do this without them. Virgil was right; they were a team. And _what a team_. 


	6. Six Geese A'Laying

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kid!Deceit, Patton, Kid!Roman, Kid!Remus, Virgil & Kid!Logan, Victorian(ish) AU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roughly Victorian-ish setting. Young Daniel (Deceit) is sent away to the countryside for unknown reasons to stay with his Uncle Patton and his cousins Roman and Remus. These are excerpts from his diary, spanning from his arrival in the beginning of winter to Christmas day. Soft warning for themes of child abandonment/neglect.

Dear diary. 

I don't like it here. The farm is smelly and loud and the house is always dirty no matter how much I complain! My cousins are rowdy and disgusting and crude, and Remus in particular had developed a fondness for flinging animal dung at me whenever I'm forced out to help. He and Roman are the most boorish, awful boys I've ever met. Why did I have to be related to them? 

It's not fair. I want to go back home but Uncle Patton says it's not possible right now, and that father is expecting me to stay until the new year at **least** , even though that's so long! I'm going to have the worst time **ever**. 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

I hate it I hate it I hate it! I hate **them**! Roman keeps making fun of my birthmark and he won't stop even when I say so and when I pushed him over Uncle Patton was angry at **me** instead! I HATE IT HERE. They wouldn't even believe me when I said I was too sick to do my chores today- Uncle Patton says lying is bad but Roman and Remus do it all the time, especially when they've done something bad and want to blame me. I only do it sometimes, because they deserve it. 

There was one good thing today- the man that looks after the horses in the barn let me ride the gelding for the first time. His name is Verjel (I think?) and he's very tall and very quiet and very polite. I told him it was nice to meet someone with some manners and respect in this dump and he just smiled and showed me how to feed the horses right so they don't bite your hand. I like the horses now. 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

Roman is a total beast. He hid my gloves outside in the pig sty where they got utterly ruined, and then he refused to admit to it when Uncle Patton asked. It was really obvious it was him though, and Uncle Patton said he was in big trouble. He also said it was okay when I cried, but I made him promise not to tell anyone. He also said we could go and get some more in the market in a few days, but they won't be the same. Those were my special birthday gloves from father last year, and they were made in India I think. I don't think they'll have them in the market here in this nowhere town. 

Virgil (I asked how to spell his name, he said I could find it in a book and he brought me the book yesterday so I could see it, but I'm not allowed to read the book yet because Uncle Patton says it's too scary for me) let me come and take the horses out today. I helped him pull them to the pasture in the early morning, and I got up especially for it! Uncle Patton said it was good to see me finally taking an interest, but I'm not really, it's only because Virgil is showing me the more grown up stuff. Remus isn't allowed to help with the horses yet, and Roman is a scaredy cat. I'm the only one Virgil lets work with him and I think it's neat. 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

It's nearly Christmas and father has written me a letter! He says he will visit for Christmas day before he has to return to the manor to continue sorting things out. I don't know what things there are to sort out, but it sounds terribly important. Uncle Patton didn't look very happy when he read his letter, but he wouldn't tell me why. He said he was excited to hear about father's visit, but I think he was lying. Why do grown ups do that so much, and then tell **us** off for it? 

Remus was nice to me today. He said it was very impressive that I was allowed to help with the horses so much, and he helped me carry the tack (that's what Virgil calls the saddle and the bridle and the reins and things) back to the tack room. I said I would ask if Virgil would let him ride the gelding for Christmas maybe. I hope he says yes- Remus looked very happy and it was really nice. 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

Father is delayed. He was meant to arrive the night before Christmas, but he sent word that he was stuck at home still. Roman said it meant he wasn't coming because I'm not important enough, and I hit him. Uncle Patton was very upset with both of us, but it was all Roman's stupid fault! Of course I'm important enough! Roman is a poop head and I will never like him. Uncle Patton said Roman was just upset because his father is no longer around, but he wouldn't explain what that meant and I think he was lying again because he likes Roman more, because Roman is the best at milking the cows. 

When father arrives I will tell him how mean Roman has been (Remus is my friend now so not him) and he will take me far away from here. I will miss Remus and Virgil a little bit, but I miss my room and my gloves and my butler so much more. I will not miss Roman. I might miss Uncle Patton a little bit, but only if he's not mean to me again before then. 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

Father is unable to come for Christmas. I think I may run away.

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

I'm in big trouble and I might not be allowed to help Virgil with the horses again. Uncle Patton has banned me going anywhere without him after I nearly froze to death in the barn. Which isn't true! I was just fine sleeping there and I was just a **bit** cold, and Virgil found me right away in the morning! Uncle Patton was really angry though, and he cried a bit which was strange, and even Roman has been very quiet recently. I was only in bed asleep for two days, not even half a week! I was just really tired, I don't know why they're blaming me. 

Remus made me a drawing when I was in bed. It's really ugly but I love it. It has me, Remus, Virgil and the gelding in a field fighting an evil dragon that has eaten lots of people. It's a bit horrid but it makes me happy to see it anyway. Roman hasn't spoken to me at all. I wonder if he's sick too? 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

Roman had a horrible nightmare last night. It woke everyone up, and even Remus was crying about it. Uncle Patton promised it was just a bad dream but Roman didn't eat any breakfast and Remus was acting weird after they had private twin time and talked about it. I think they talked about it, anyway. Uncle Patton says there are some things that aren't meant to be shared and that I mustn't ask what it's about, because if Roman wants to tell me he will. I think that's silly- he never wants to tell me anything! So how will I know what's going on if I don't ask? 

Father sent a gift ahead of Christmas to say sorry. I have put it under the tree and I'll open it when he should have been here. Why couldn't he come for one day? I asked Virgil and he says it's only a medium long trip, and can be done in a day in the carriage. Then he said I must promise him to tell him if I want to go away anywhere so he can help me, and I did. I won't go anywhere though. Father didn't put anything in his message about when I was sick. Maybe Uncle Patton didn't tell him? He would probably have come if he knew. 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

Tomorrow is Christmas. The animals are in the barn and we all went to sing carols at the church down the lane, and me and Remus and Roman sat on the gelding while Virgil and Uncle Patton walked. It was really pretty inside and everyone was really jolly and there were mince pies and another boy named Logan played chase with us so it was really fun. It was really late because it was called midnight mass and I was so tired I fell asleep on the gelding and Virgil had to piggy back me home instead. Then we all had a sleepover in Remus and Roman's room, after we put our stockings out and some carrots out for the reindeer. I hope I don't get coal- Remus says he knows someone who got coal once, but he never has even though he's not always good at not being naughty. I used to hope Roman would get coal, but he's been a lot nicer since I was sick and I think we could be nearly friends now. So I don't hope he gets coal. 

I wish father were here to blow out the candle. Uncle Patton doesn't do it quite right. But he's here to do it now anyway, so goodnight. 

Love, 

Daniel

* * *

Dear diary, 

I had the best Christmas ever! There was a big turkey to eat and no one got any coal and I got some new gloves from Roman and Remus and a book about horses from Uncle Patton and the bestest of all was from Virgil- I got my own horse riding boots! They're not new but they almost fit really well and they're shiny because Virgil cleaned them lots and he says we can add extra socks to make sure I can wear them right away! Father's gift was just a toy car but I'm not grateful, even if Uncle Patton says I should be. I gave it to Roman because he likes cars and he gave me a hug. It was nice. 

When we went outside to play in the snow I was on Roman's team against Remus and we won, and then we switched and I was with Remus and we won again! I think I'm good at snowball fights. Virgil told us all a story after dinner and we went out to collect the eggs, and Uncle Patton made a funny joke about the geese, but they don't lay eggs at Christmas time, Logan told me that when we met, so I don't know why it was funny. 

I love it here. I never want to leave **ever**! 

Love, 

Daniel


	7. Seven Swans A'Swimming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman, Deceit, Remus, Thomas, Virgil, Logan & Patton, Swan Lake AU (Romantic Logan/Patton)

The swans circled the lake on powerful but quiet wings. They flashed like ghosts in the dark night sky, _one-two-three-four-five-six-seven_ , coming in to land in the water in seven large sprays of water. 

Logan was the first to step out on human feet, stretching out his neck with newly formed fingers, brushing away the last of the feathers on his arms as he turned to wait for the rest. Patton followed swiftly on his heels, tumbling gracelessly into his arms with a tinkling laugh until he caught his balance again and the two of them whisked off into the woods together. Deacon, Thomas and Roman were next, helping each other to the shore to sit down and watch the show. 

The show was the same every night; Remus would spread his huge wingspan wide and spray the water into a shower of glittering droplets in the moonlight with his webbed feet as he skidded over the water for as long as he could before bellyflopping into the water with a victorious screech, vocal chords somewhere between swan and man. And then came Virgil. The only black swan among them, for reasons unknown to the group (the sorcerer that had cast the spell to curse them this way hadn't exactly stopped to chat or explain the rules of their new living situation). Virgil's inky feathers gleamed in the darkness, moonlight hitting just right to cast him as a shadow on the sky. He stayed in the air as long as he could, tipping on his side to dip a wing into the water when the call of the night grew too strong and he landed in the shallows, looking longingly back up at the sky as he hugged himself. 

Out of all of them, Virgil remembered the most. Maybe that was why he was different to the rest. He often wondered if the oddities marked him as the original target of the spell, and if that meant it was _his_ fault they were all cursed... It was not even particularly a question he wanted answered, because he couldn't quite bear to hear that it _was_. 

"Dance with me!" Thomas cried and pulled Roman to his feet, and together they beamed twin bright smiles as they twirled off around the shoreline, kicking up water and laughing while they benefited from their temporary legs. Remus twirled by himself, lost in his own fantastical world with his eyes closed and face uncharacteristically concentrated on his movement. Virgil sighed, looking away from them all to the dark woods where Patton and Logan had vanished, glad they could find some happiness in this endless routine of theirs. It was heartwarming really, to see hope and delight and pleasure shared in the face of adversity- no matter what the sorcerer had intended he hadn't been able to snuff that out entirely and Virgil (and the rest of the men, in fact) were determined to keep it that way. It was wonderful to see, and yet it broke his heart because they should have been _free_ ; free to walk together in the daylight and explore the world on two feet and kiss and kiss whenever and wherever they wanted. Not confined to the nights here at this same lake day by gruelling, tiresome day-

Virgil was jolted from his thoughts by the brush of fingers over his back as Deacon circled around him, coming to a halt face to face and raising an eyebrow as he searched the black swan's face. "You're thinking. Thinking sad things, again," he said softly, each word measured and weighted. Deacon, like most of them, had long ago left language behind, to be used sparingly and only when absolutely necessary. Roman was perhaps the exception there, and- occasionally with Thomas when he could be persuaded- he often sang to the moon and stars in the final hours before the dawn, when he would be abruptly cut off as his neck lengthened and tightened and his music was choked away by the curse. "Stop," said Deacon, interrupting his melancholy again. He curled his fingers and pushed his knuckles up under Virgil's chin until they were eye to eye, speaking just with his expression to convey his stern disapproval of the negativity Virgil carried around. Virgil, for his part, managed not to wilt away from the chiding, but did cast his eyes down briefly in apology, head tilting sideways and bare shoulder lifting to almost meet it in a move reminiscent of their habits as birds, deferential and respectful. It made Deacon scoff softly but he let his hand move to the back of Virgil's neck to rub their cheeks together once as he accepted the gesture and reassured the black swan that it was alright, he wasn't upset or angry, and they silently moved to sit pressed together as they watched the three dancers, ignoring the movement of the moon and pretending that time wasn't passing and the curse wasn't already creeping up on them again. 

Patton and Logan rejoined them a little while later, swimming like the waterbirds they were in graceful loops around each other while Thomas, Roman and Remus danced and danced and danced. It made Virgil ache to watch them all, in such constant motion together, living their lives as fully and brightly as they could within their limited time. Deacon pressed his chin hard into the softness of his shoulder when he realised Virgil had been lost to sadness again, and they resettled for the final few hours. 

Thomas sang with Roman that night, their feet still endlessly moving, calling to the others until they were drawn together in the pre-dawn lightening of the world, spinning and splashing and twisting and never bumping into one another or pausing to think. Virgil spun out into the water and up on black wings as the first rays of sunlight crested the trees around them, Remus charging up into the air hot on his heels. Deacon followed more slowly, waiting for the moment in the breath between a pirouette and what should have been a graceful leap to lift up in a great downsweep of his own wings. Roman kept singing, even as Thomas' voice cut off and he took off, and Patton and Logan walked into the water with their fingers entwined, until fingers became feathers and they swam together instead, heads twined closely, waiting for the last moment before their instincts kicked in and they joined the flock. 

A breath, two, later and Roman's voice stuttered into nothingness as well, and the lake fell silent but for the rush of air from beating wings. 

The night was over. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't thought in depth about the details of this potential AU but I love the concept of it. There were seven of them to play with so it fit very well! And it goes unsaid but it is set at Christmas time, and yes- they're all nude. What can I say, shapeshifting with clothes gives me hives welp. 
> 
> Logan and Patton are together in this, and the rest could be anything you choose to believe... 
> 
> Also I should have done multiples today to finish on time tomorrow but life don't work that way, so I'll be continuing this until I get the the big one-two, probably at the weekend! And then who knows, maybe I'll develop some of these little snippets further some day :)
> 
> Merry Christmas tomorrow, those of you who celebrate!


	8. Eight Maids A'Milking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fem!Virgil, Fem!Hispanic!Roman, Fem!Patton & Fem!Logan, 1950s Fem!Sides Highschool AU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for mentions of racist bullying (against a hispanic character) and vaguely alluded to abusive relationship.

Poodle skirts and patent shoes filled the school gym, all decked out in the finest cheesy Christmas decor imaginable. The school Christmas dance, rather a tradition by now despite it's unpopularity sitting only a few weeks after homecoming; was in full swing. Over the sounds of the band and the emcee calling the dances, there was giggling and chatter from every corner, generated by just over a hundred teenage voices all overexcited by the prospect of romance and potentially spiked punch. 

Some were more excited than others, and Virginia Sanders was on the lower end of the spectrum. Her mouth was set firmly in a distasteful pout, chin in her hand as she slouched on the bleachers with her elbow digging a dull ache in her knee and her second-hand skirt rumpling underneath her. It wasn't exactly her idea of good festive fun. Too many hormones and loud noises and _people_. Worse- _teenagers_ , and yeah so what she thought it with such disgust when she was one herself? It wasn't like she was _happy_ about it. 

If only the kids at her new school weren't like the kids at every other dang high school she'd been to in the last two years (a total of five, but one of them hardly counted as it had technically been summer break all but one week they'd been in town). Then at least she might not be sitting there alone, as usual, wishing she was at home or sneaking out to play baseball with her recently inaugurated best ( _only_ ) friend Patty. Patty had a wicked arm- Virginia was sure she could beat anyone on the team with her fastball, not that anyone would care to discover it.

But Patty was, much to Virginia's dismay, one of the more enthusiastic in their year about things like Christmas dances and new outfits. She was even on the planning committees and a cheerleader to boot. But she did look cute as a button, done up in her powder blue skirt with the little white flowers, a matching ornament in her perfectly pinned up silky blonde curls. Oh how they gently caressed her face when she twisted side to side to the music and how her smile lit up the room when she grinned and waved over at Virginia... 

Virginia sat up sharply with a faint blush, lifting her hand in brief reply and looking away quickly, smoothing down her skirts. She missed the slight fall of Patty's expression, but the other girl stayed on the dance floor when the rest of her group squealed at the start of a new song and dragged her back into the fray.

On the opposite side of the room a different girl was stood watching the mass of bodies out in the centre of the room with considerably less disgust and considerably more longing. She tossed her dark head, rubbing the corsage on her wrist that had no partner, and sighed deeply as she resisted the urge to sway to the music. Rosanna Castillo did not have friends like Patty did, to dance and gasp and laugh with. Rosanna Castillo had classmates, who would mock her accent when it came out and make snide and unsubtle remarks about _how good she must be at laundry_ , and _whether she was available to cook dinner, for a small fee of course_... 

Rosanna Castillo wished she could go out there and dance and show them all what she was _really_ good at, but she knew she would never dare. There was only half a year left before she would be out of town and off to make her name in show business, after all. And she was a good enough actor to last that long at least. 

She cast her eyes down, catching sight of a young couple hurrying away from the dance floor; the boyfriend chasing after his clearly distressed girlfriend. She tried not to eavesdrop as they came to a stop near the wall she was hovering by, the boy grabbing his girlfriend's arm and yanking her around to face him as he hissed at her from up close. Her glasses slipped down her nose and she flinched when he pushed them back up her nose. Rosanna's hackles raised instinctively and she focused harder on what was going on. 

" _Sweetie_ , you know you have to stay out and dance with me or it'll look awful for both of us! You can't just _leave._ " 

"I won't stand there and smile while your stupid friends say those horrible things it's just not fair, Dee!" Dee's smile was pained in the coloured lights, pasted on for show, and his grip didn't shift as the girl pushed at his hand, trying to free herself. "I'm going home, let go of me! You _know_ I didn't want to come anyway-"

"Don't be ridiculous honey you're embarrassing yourself. Lori stop it I'm not gonna let go. Lori! _Loren-Ann stop making a fuss_!" He tugged her a little closer but she'd apparently reached her limit, and before Rosanna could move to intervene Loren-Ann had stomped hard on her boyfriend's foot and followed up with a knee to his stomach as he doubled over, leaving him gasping and clutching at the wall to stay upright as she stormed off. 

Rosanna was impressed beyond belief. She darted after her new heroine as the girl in question shoved through the doors and out into the night, intending to make sure she was okay. 

Back on the other side of the gym Virginia was trying _not_ to watch as the music slowed down and Patty moved smoothly into the arms of a boy, it looked like the large Tight End on the football team, Norm or Nick or something equally generic. Virginia spitefully thought to herself that his end probably wasn't even that tight, and immediately felt bad about the nastiness. It was unbecoming of a lady, her mother would have said, and despite herself Virginia couldn't quite shake the drilled-in response of nauseous guilt at even the imagined sound of her mother's shrill voice, always picking picking picking at Virginia no matter what she did- 

She stopped her line of thinking to take a few deep breaths, standing up and descending the bleachers carefully, unaccustomed to the kitten heels she was wearing. Unaccustomed to all the frippery and finery and the hot sting of something she wasn't sure about in her chest (it ached like jealousy, but she had to deny that or else she'd have to start thinking about _why_ and jealous of _what_ or worse- _who_ ) and gosh dang it she needed to not be here anymore. 

The door beckoned and the cool air was delightful on Virginia's skin as she burst out of the gym and made for the parking lot, unaware that she was about to stumble over two other early escapees, sharing the tentative beginning of a conversation that was destined to lead to a surprising new friendship. Unaware that Patty would clock her absence once the dance was over and Nate had let her slip away from his sweaty hands and overwhelming cologne to go 'to the bathroom', whereupon she would _actually_ have to go to the bathroom to take a few moments to herself as she let the disappointment pass. And unaware that- contrary to expectation- her future held a whole lot of new and exciting things to come before the year was out... 

For now she was just thinking about how much better life would be when she got into bed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Baby's first genderbend! This became a(nother) 50s AU roundabout the time I realised that the fem names I'd come up with were all a little... dated! Anywho, I had fun, even if the association to 8 maids a milking was a little tenuous welp. Thanks to the tumblr series follower who suggested the genderbend when I ran out of ideas, this one is for you!
> 
> May come back to this one later on; I've had a surprising amount of ideas around this little snippet. Anyone interested??


	9. Nine Ladies Dancing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fem!Virgil, Fem!Patton, Fem!Logan, Fem!Hispanic!Roman, Hispanic!Remus, Genderfluid!Remy & Hispanic!Emile, 1950s (soon to be 60s) Genderbend AU

The sixties were going to be good to them, Rosanna thought to herself with absolute confidence and a whole lot of stubborn determination, taking in the sight of her family spread around the tiny living room. They perched on the ratty armchair, the wooden floor with its well-worn rug, the chaise longue she'd got to recline dramatically in, chatting and laughing and drinking their homemade eggnog. It was perfect. 

"Ro! ¿Qué pasa?" Remus called from his sprawl by the fireplace, long legs extended out in front of him and crossed at the ankle to keep from hitting any of the glasses nearby as he tapped his toes to the music. He grinned at his sister lazily, and Rosanna felt a rush of affection for him, walking over to ruffle his mass of dark curls until he squawked in protest. "No fair, hermana, no fair," he grumbled, flicking her ankle while she was still in range. 

"You need a haircut, Re, or else it wouldn't be such a good target," she shot back, letting her tongue curl around the Rs for once, unwilling to hide herself here in her safest place. Remus just wrinkled his nose and had another swig of his drink as he went back to watching a conversation on the other side of the space, and Rosanna made her way back to her chaise to lounge like the roman goddess she'd always known she was meant to be. She smoothed the fabric of her pants down and got comfy, tapping Patty on the shoulder to request her own glass be handed up to her. 

The conversation Remus was watching was heated and passionate- their cousin Emilio was debating the fine details of some comic he read with the newest addition to their group; a flamboyant, fabulous and fantastic individual by the name of Remy. They were a well known drag queen who often performed at their favourite bar, and had been unquestioningly adopted just over three weeks ago when Remus and Patty had spotted her trying to gather herself to go home after apparently being mugged. When they'd discovered Remy didn't exactly have anywhere to go Remus had promptly offered his own flat and they'd agreed, and now Remus was smitten and Remy was part of the team. There were a tonne of bets out on what would happen and when, with the most popular being that Remus would most likely actually explode if Remy ever showed him any hint of affection or returned attraction. Remy, through Emilio, was secretly in on the bets and not entirely sure how he felt about them. It was all very exciting. It wasn't everyday you joined a family that understood and listened to your coloured ribbon rules and still wanted you around. 

Remus watched as Remy fiddled with the three bright ribbons wrapped around their wrist for the night and Rosanna watched _him_ watch his roommate and grinned behind her glass at the sappy look on his usually manic face. 

She was distracted when Virginia reached over and moved the record needle, prompting a round of shouts from the group (protests at changing the track from Remy and quickly after Remus; delight at the new option from Patty and Emilio; and laughter from Rosanna- Loren just smiled into the back of Virginia's shoulder and cuddled her a little tighter like a treasured stuffed toy, drunk off happiness and comfort and eggnog). But then Patty was jumping up and shooing Remus' feet out of the way so she could tug Rosanna up into a fast-paced dance, skirts flying as they boogied. Virginia sat up and shimmied along in time as Remus joined the dancers, moving wildly entirely on his own. 

At least until he bumped into Remy- who had jumped onto the chaise to do the same thing- and knocked her off balance and into his arms. The others collectively ignored their moment of shared stillness, and with shouts and whoops of encouragement (the neighbours were _not_ going to like _that_ ) everyone ended up on their feet, revelling in their shared euphoria of being utterly, _wonderfully_ alive and whole and hearty. 

Patty took Virginia's hand and Rosanna span away to steal Loren from her and they all smiled at each other. 

Yes, Rosanna thought, the sixties were going to be good to them. They'd _damn well make sure of it_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kicking myself for not using the previous short for this chapter, but I was excited to get a chance to write more for this AU! 
> 
> It's meant to be set a few years after the previous one, once they're all graduated and living in the big city together. They've been through Some Stuff but they're all celebrating Christmas and New Year together in Rosanna, Virginia, Patty and Loren-Ann's apartment. I've got a lot more detail in my head but hopefully what's in the snippet is self-explanatory! 
> 
> To clarify for Remy- in this particular scene he's using all pronouns (hence the three different ribbons, for he/him, she/her and they/them) so I just wrote what felt natural at each point (projecting much? me? neverrrr) and hopefully it all makes sense! 
> 
> For the girls' relationships- up to you if you wanna view it as romantic, sexual, and who is with who. Just know they all live together and love each other very much, either way!


	10. Ten Lords A'Leaping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thief!Virgil & Prince!Roman, Fantasy AU

Down the corridor, three doors along, left turn through the next hall and out of _that_ _window there_ \- 

"Stop thief! Stop!" A yell from behind, don't turn around, don't hesitate, dodge the servant reaching with clawed fingers, leap over the fallen cabinet, into the next corridor, round the hall in through a door, close the door, don't move don't make a sound don't even _breathe_ \- 

"Hello." The voice is amused. The thief looks up sharply to see a figure rising from a seat in the window, gently placing a book where they were sat. It's a nice voice, rich and warm and unconcerned by the intrusion. Confident. And that's not concerning at all... The thief twitches back as the figure approaches, but there's nowhere to go, nowhere to run to with the commotion sounding out in the corridor and- but the window is open beyond the figure and the thief knows he's on a low enough floor to make the jump... 

"I assume you're to blame for all the noise out there?" The figure asks, stopping in front of the still-frozen thief, who keeps his head down, hood covering his face. He has a dagger ready behind his back in case they attack, but they're just standing there. He can see soft leather boots, well used but well polished, and rich cream britches above. Simple but clearly of outstanding quality, and- oh shit. A hand comes into view, reaching under the hood curiously but the thief pulls his blade and touches it to the rich, tan skin of the wrist, just beyond the golden thread embroidering the sleeve. 

The hand stills and retreats slowly, perfectly manicured fingers sliding out of view. The thoughtful hum is less amused and more... considering. The thief prepares himself and when the figure steps back and there's the slick sound of a blade being drawn he is ready, lunging forwards to get close before the longer reach of the sword is able to be utilised. The figure huffs when he hits into them, pushed back and grappling for control of the weapons. 

They both hit what appears to be a low bench and go tumbling, and the thief is glad to see the sword get flung away because he has managed to maintain his grip on his dagger and he slashes out towards the figure. Unfortunately the figure is fast- _very_ fast- because his arm is caught in a strong hand and _pulled_ , so he falls forwards and is twisted sharply onto the floor underneath the figure, who promptly pins his other hand and sits on his knees in a move that has the thief winded and also deeply impressed. He keeps hold of his dagger but doesn't struggle yet, panting for breath after the short fight. The figure bends down close and he catches a glimpse of a strong jaw and white teeth from under the edge of the hood. Plush lips curl up and the thief's attacker chuckles softly. "I'll take that as a yes, troublemaker." 

The thief stays quiet, fighting the urge to sass back, and the figure laughs softly, easing off and sitting back, hands up to indicate a cease-fire. "I won't hurt you if you don't hurt me. That's the most fun I've had in _months_." Up they stand, and then a hand comes down to help the thief up. He hesitates for a moment before taking it, startled but not surprised when the figure takes the opening to pull him forwards against their body and push his hood down. 

Their eyes meet, scanning each other's faces with curiosity and tactical analysis. The thief notes the man's well-groomed appearance and sharp eyes, beautiful warm brown to match his glossy hair that curls over his forehead; his strong but lean build that indicates not only good health but probably a great deal of training; his self-satisfied smirk that looks so easy on his cheerful face. He's handsome and cocky and the thief is intrigued. 

To the other, the thief is all pale skin and exhaustion- bags under his eyes that only serve to bring out his sharp cheekbones and soft pout that looks like it would be tempting to turn up into a smile. 

The thief doesn't smile. He eyes the man silently, waiting to see what will happen. When the noise outside increases they both glance in the direction of the door before turning back to each other, and the man's sharp, clever eyes scan him once before he grins. The thief chances a look to the side where the window is as the man turns, clearly about to call out. He uses the man's inattention to wrench free, racing for the window and leaping out and down to the ground where he falls in a neat roll and races off to freedom, hearing the man shout out of the window behind him. 

For some reason Virgil is laughing when he finally slows down, far enough away to be safe from capture. He feels exhilarated and energised and alive in a way he hasn't in a good long while. 

Inside the castle, Roman is feeling exactly the same. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thief!Virgil taking a leap out a castle window was the first image I had when I thought about this prompt!


	11. Eleven Pipers Piping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton, Logan, Virgil & Roman, Modern AU

Patton wiped the sweat off his brow with the back of his wrist, huffing and setting his tools down. The noise of metal on metal was never-ending and the day was long, but it was nearly lunchtime and for Patton that meant his third favourite part of the day; visiting time. 

He straightened up from his crouch near the newly installed bathtub, stretching his back and wincing as it cracked. He raised a hand and waved over at Roman, who was doing similar in another room, visible past the skeletal structure of the walls and gaps where the doors would eventually be. They met outside the building, stepping into the winter sun and nudging each other playfully as they wandered to the park next door where they always spent their break, weather permitting, and settled comfortably onto a picnic bench with twin groans of relief. 

Patton closed his eyes and spread his arms out beside him along the table at his back, receiving a prod from Roman when he accidentally whacked him in the chest. The orange light glowed behind his eyelids and the sounds around them seemed to swell into a beautiful spring chorus, drowning everything out until he felt he was being lulled into a nap by a symphony of nature. And then a shadow fell over his face. He wrinkled his nose but smiled, keeping his eyes shut until there was a soft press of lips to his own. To his right he could hear Roman's low chuckle and the sound of murmurs, and a weight adding to the bench. 

"You made it on time then?" The plumber asked, and the lips moved to his cheek before pulling away. He squinted an eye open to see his first favourite sight- his gently smiling and well-dressed boyfriend Logan, adjusting his glasses and carrying an appealing looking bag. "And you brought goodies!" 

"Goodies that are also good for you. You have to keep your energy up on site, you know," Logan told him, sitting on the opposite bench (which was far too far away, and Patton pouted, but also _perfect_ for footsie) and pulling the contents out. They shared their food and a gentle conversation while Roman and Virgil got a little carried away canoodling and had to be brought back to reality with a loud 'ahem' and an amused grin from the other two. 

When Virgil had settled all his clothes back down and his blush had begun to fade, he joined Logan on the other side and spread the thermos flasks out as well, offering the coffee and soup out, hand on the table and fingers entwined with Roman's the whole while. The atmosphere was lazy and peaceful- it wasn't exactly a busy location this deep in the winter season- and Patton sighed several times until Roman eventually asked him if he was okay. 

Patton just smiled. "Of course, Ro! I'm just... I'm so happy. _So_ happy, with all of us here! Everything's wonderful and great and Christmas is soon and it'll be the holidays tomorrow and, gosh it's just _nice_ , isn't it?" He received three varied smiles in reply, and Roman tugged him close with an arm around his shoulders, beaming down at him and booping him on the nose. 

"You bed, Patty-cake. And when we get off later we can go home and be warm and-"

"And watch Frozen for the millionth time?" Virgil interjected, dry tone at odds with his sappy fond expression. 

"And watch a film we _all_ want to, _actually_ , and if that's Frozen well then-" Roman huffed, feigning offence at the accusation. Patton snuggled into him comfortably and took the apple slices Logan pushed towards him to munch on while Virgil and Roman set off on a heated discussion about democracy and how it should and often did _not_ relate to their movie viewing habits. Logan winked at him when he sighed, _again_ , and Patton tucked his foot more firmly against the ankle it rested by, seeing Logan's eyes soften and his cheeks pink ever so slightly. 

All too soon it was time to go back to work. Virgil pounced on Roman for a (read: several) goodbye kiss and Logan held Patton close to kiss the top of his head briefly and head off to work. Patton admired him as he left, because damn he cut a fine figure in his three-piece suit and sharp winter coat. It sometimes made Patton feel a little off, knowing he was a bog-standard plumber who worked in oil-stained jeans and duffel coats and didn't know much about much, but mostly it just made him feel proud as all heck. Especially when Roman whistled and Virgil chuckled his agreement at the sentiment. 

As they got started on their afternoon tasks, Patton switched his focus to the impending favourite part of the day; home time. It would be Christmas soon after all, and he fully intended on making the most of every minute they would be able to spend entirely at home together doing whatever they liked. He maybe had a few plans...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plumbers was what I settled on when I thought hard about this prompt, I hope it works hahah
> 
> Can be interpreted as LAMP or Logicality and Prinxiety, or any other iteration you take from it! 
> 
> One more left tomorrow, but I still have ideas all the time and it's pretty good brain exercise to do these a lot so I may set up a different series for more daily oneshots in the near future, once I've paid a little attention to my other fics of course!!


	12. Twelve Drummers Drumming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil, Deceit, Remus & Mentioned Logan, High School AU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for: Character with ADHD not getting adequate support in school, insensitivity to cultural winter festivals, tiny bit of swearing.

High school sucked. Anyone who disagreed was probably lying, or rich and pretty or something. Because high school _sucked_ and that was just common knowledge, right? 

It certainly felt that way to one Dante Inganno, every time he had to trudge up the path to the grey concrete buildings of Hamilton High School, New York. He would have groaned aloud if not for the need to maintain his facade of cool, superior indifference to the whole situation and sort of just to life in general- it was kinda his thing these days. That and his punk rock outfit and his ever-present black poncho-cape-hoodie combination that he'd found in a thrift store. His cousin Emile called it a safety blanket and said it was an unhealthy coping mechanism and not a valid personality trait by itself, but once ( _one glorious time_ ) Virgil Sanders had call it 'neat', so he was just never ever wearing anything else ever again, basically. And it was an outer layer, Emilio; it didn't need to be washed very often. 

Virgil Sanders was dreamy A. F. 

Look, it wasn't even a biased opinion, okay? Virgil Sanders was dreamy- he had long purple hair and deep brown eyes with the longest eyelashes _ever_. His skin was annoyingly clear and his face was attractively symmetrical apart from one tooth that snaggled very slightly that was only visible on the rare occasions he grinned. He wore makeup most days, and it highlighted his eyes really nicely, and even though he was a bit of an eboy and Dante didn't really hold a high opinion of fads like that, he was unfairly pleasant whenever they talked. So... Dreamy. Case closed. 

It was right at the end of term at long last, so at least today Dante felt a tiny bit less _ugh_ about arriving at school. And when Virgil flipped him a subtle peace sign and a soft smirk as they passed each other in the hall, the _ugh_ ness receded another bit. It returned full force after lunch break though, when he was abruptly reminded that as part of their winter festive celebrations (it would have been a nice gesture not to name it after Christmas if the staff hadn't promptly forgotten any other winter holidays existed and failed to mention them ever- a stance that student president Logan Doyle was hotly and loudly opposing), they would have to endure a stupid whole school assembly, complete with pep rally even though there was nothing to be pepped for. Dante actually _did_ groan when the chirpy voice on the tannoy reminded them all, complete with no less than seven puns and a bubbly laugh. Ugh, ugh and triple _ugh_. 

Still, at least he got to gaze at Virgil for three hours while they sat and shivered on the football field bleachers, he realised when he saw the other boy sit two rows ahead and a few people across, within convenient gazing distance. He wasn't prepared for Virgil to turn around to grab something from his backpack and notice the eyes, offering him a flutter of fingers in an approximation of a subtle wave, and the turning up of the corner of his mouth. It made Dante's stomach bubble weirdly, and he resolutely nodded back and turned forwards, determined to ignore his flaming cheeks and at least try and focus on the spectacle in front of them. He couldn't help but cast a few more glances over though, but when the band came out to play and do their funky manoeuvres Virgil seemed utterly rapt, sitting forwards and craning his neck to follow someone in particular. Dante, try as he might, couldn't figure out who Virgil was suddenly cheering for and pulling his phone out to capture on video, but by the good name of Keanu Reeves he wished it could be him. 

It was only when they'd taken their bows and were preparing to move off the field for the arrival of the principal that it became clear- one of the clump of drummers waved and whistled and Virgil blew a kiss down. With a squint, Dante recognised the figure to be Remus, a bit of a troublemaker. Well, a _lot_ of a troublemaker, constantly in detention and rumoured to have been kicked out of special ed despite his ADHD because the teachers 'couldn't handle him'. Fuckers. Remus was... okay, not the worst person to have as a rival for Virgil's affections, really. And it wasn't exactly Virgil's _affections_ that Dante wanted _anyway_ , he just thought it would be pretty... well, to borrow Virgil's own word; _neat_ , if they could be friends. And maybe that was still possible, he told himself, reaffirmed when Virgil Sanders dropped down next to him on the bleachers as everyone hurried off to get to their lockers and go home (after they'd endured far too much waffling from the far too cliche old white man who supposedly ran their school); faced him head on with a soft smile; and said, "Hey, I'm Virgil."

Dante's mouth turned up in a smile of his own. So maybe not _all_ of high school sucked. But _mostly_ it did. _Ugh_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The final one! 
> 
> I chose to headcanon Deceit as Ace in this particular snippet, but you can totally read it as early days friends to lovers, with optional bonus Remus! 
> 
> Yes that voice on the tannoy is Patton- he gets a bit overexcited sometimes and has to be reigned in, a la Lee Jordan from HP. 
> 
> Yes the school is a bit sucky- Remus was diagnosed with ADHD and they decided he could manage regular classes when he was about twelve because they were cutting resources, and his parents didn't bother to fight it too hard. He gets extra time on exams and his twin Roman is the best tutor ever and always helps him with his homework (they made sure to pick the same subjects so they could keep this up all the way through to graduation). 
> 
> That's it, series done! I may use some of these in future as prompts to jump off from, but this has been a great experiment/exercise. Merry end of the decade folks, and if you're looking for something to read feel free to follow me over to my next pet project: Are We Into It?! :) Or send me asks on tumblr (magpiemorality there too) for me to play with, I love writing short snippets of just about anything!


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